Ive got lots of stuff in mind that i shall say it out here. I dont wish to share it with anyone, not even my friends.
Fuck myself for ruining everything. I dont fucking know whats up with me after i ended things with E. I knew tht im not liddis last time. Things changed so fast. Whats up with me being surrounded by guys, whats up with me contacting guys and lying to myself and even the whole world about my feelings. I dont find it useful to me though. Ever since the day someone knock some sense in me and asked me to move on with life, i started to mingle around without knowing the consequences within it. I enjoyed my life to the fullest going out with different guys each day but not to the extend of my limits. Right now, at this state i cant even differentiate whats right and whats not.
For you my friend, i dont like the way u talk to me and also the way uve been treating me. Its like too fast u see. Im not yet getting over someone, i dont wish to get him off my mind or my heart. But i know for myself, things is going to an end. U wanted me to give u everything but u want, just so u know, ur not the one that i wanted. And ur not the right one for me.
X; I lied to you, cos u would get angry about the littlest things. U should know me well enough that i wouldnt do such things to the extend. I cried for you cos i cant bear to receive that kind of text from u and knowing that uve cried for me too. It hurts so much knowing that this is actually happening to me, to u and to us. Its not that ive known u just yesterday u see. We are not together since the past few months but it seems as though we still cared and love each other. U know thatt my feelings for you hasnt fade away, and that is why im not letting u go now. But now, that everyths over. I cant do anything, except to cry everything out. I just miss everything about you.
Having a crush on someone you like isnt a wrong thing to do. But wonder why must it be you. Oh, i cant explain this. It's just so complicating urgh! I want to be on my own, i dont need anyone right now, if possible jst you. But ur not gna be here for me anymore.

I hate waking up early in the morning cause i'm gonna get bored and there's nothing to do, except lappy. It's only like what? 8.37am? Geeezz! Not sure if i'm going out(allowed to) today. Sick and tired of doing housechores. Everyones should still be asleep now.

Oh yeah. Im supposed to go out today. All the way to cck to fetch that little monster and out to nowhere. Haha, but it's not confirmed yett. Like i said, not sure if i'm allowed to go out. Uhm, yesterday went out for a lil while. Cabbed to my aunt's place to take some stuff and it's like raining heavily lah. Met A at library busstop then off back to around my area. Slack here and there. Then A went home.
Now my elbow hurts cause i accidently hit it at the edge of the table. Its swollen sehh..

I don't like the way u talked to me. Why must u believe what u see. I hate u jumping to conclusion. Ur mad cause u can't believe what i said. Oh hah, stop comparing me with anyone else laaa. Im so so so so sorry for hurting u but i swear it wasn't true. I'll prove u wrong.